It's hard to believe that mom has been gone for a whole year. In some ways it seems much longer and in others much shorter. We are all doing great but we do miss her a lot. She was one of my best friends and I have missed her wisdom and her wit. You never realize how much you rely on your mother for advice until she is no longer there. It is the simple things that you miss the most, like calling her up to ask her on what temperature do you cook an 11 pound roast that you need done in four hours.
What I remember most about my mother was her love of people. She loved everyone, and I mean everyone. It took forever to go anywhere with her because she would always run into at least ten people she knew, or, if she didn't know anyone she would talk to the person standing in line next to her and find some connection and they would suddenly become a good friend. She didn't know how to use the word "no", if someone was in a tight spot she would help them out, regardless of much she didn't have. Sometimes I would have to get after her because she would let people take advantage of her but, luckily for everyone, she wouldn't really listen and she never changed. I remember when I was younger I saw her putting $20.00 bills into envelopes with cards that she wouldn't sign when she knew someone was in a tight fix. What impressed me the most is she would do this when she was stressing about having enough money for one of my siblings birthday presents. If you have ever received some money anonymously, there is a good chance that she was the one who sent it.
The other thing I remember most about my mother was her courage. The first time she was diagnosed with cancer she never once whined about what she was going through. The only time she really was upset was when she lost her beautiful hair but even then she went to 'Vegas and bought several wigs where all the showgirls got their wigs. She got two brunette wigs and one blond saying "I want to know if blonds have more fun and now is my chance to find out."
The second time she was diagnosed and when she was so ill she told me how everyone kept commenting on how well she was taking it all. She said, "People don't understand why I don't say 'Why me?' Well, when you say that you are really saying 'Why not you?' and I wouldn't wish this on anyone so I won't say that." This just shows you what an amazing women she was.
I don't know that there will ever be a time that I don't miss her but I am very glad that we got an additional ten years after her first diagnosis of cancer. That was a difference of Jillian being four years old when she was first diagnosed and Jill being fourteen when she died.
While no one can replace my mother, my family is very blessed to have several "second mothers" who have been so great to help us and take care of all of us. We love all of you and appreciate you filling in since mom can't be here (you know who you are).
11 comments:
That was a beautiful post. That is how I will always remember your mom, with a baby in her arms and a smile on her face.
Jess,
I love your mom so much! I remember going to church with your family when I was younger and it is one of my favorite memories. I loved feeling like I was part of your family... and even fighting over the Sunday morning comics. Your mom always had a way of making everyone feel important and special and she never said anything negative about anyone (except maybe twice in her whole life and it was more about what the person did and not the actual person.) I miss working with her. I loved going into work and getting to chat with her. Everyone that came in was either family or a friend or a soon-to-be-friend. Thanks for your lovely post. She always reminds me of someone that I would like to be. My question is: Is she really gone? I know she will always be with all of you in spirit looking over you. I can see a part of her expressed through you and your siblings actions and mannerisms. What a wonderful tribute to a wonderful person.
We all miss your mom as well, but fortunately for us every time I see you I see your mom! You are her she would be proud!
Your mom was amazing! We miss her, but are so grateful for her amazing example . . . and yes . . that quick wit and loving heart.
We love and miss your mom too! She really is such an amazing woman and I'm sure she is so proud of all of you!
Thank you for posting that. I can't believe it's already been a year. She was a wonderful woman.
Ive been thinking of your mom alot this month. I think October and May will be the times I think of her most. I love her so much, how blessed you are that she will always be your mother. Love you!
Jess thanks for that tribute of your mom she was an awesome lady, I miss her so much. Can i please have a copy of the video that you posted. You have done an awesome job feeling in for her Keep up the good work
That was a beautiful post. I think I need to go hug my mom now. I never knew your mom, but I do know her daughter sounds a lot like her.
You are amazing.
Hey Jessica! (It's Elisa Cox) I was just browsing around and came accross your blog. Your mom was AMAZING! I remember first hearing that she was diagnosed with cancer and was shocked. She was too young! Even sick, your mom was always smiling and giggling about something. I know that I will never forget her. How lucky you are to have her as your mom. I think that was a beautiful post and I hope you don't mind me reading it.
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